Party At Your Momma's House

So this may be a little belated but I DVRed it and just watched it today.  Edward Norton made a guest appearance and was actually quite funny.  BTW, if you don’t watch Modern Family I would strongly suggest that you start…it is very good.

Written by Emerald Catron:

“In a recent New York Times Magazine article on Megan Fox, it was revealed that the Transformers star and her publicity team are having a hard time getting women to relate to or even like her.

Or, as Megan so succinctly summed it up in the interview, “Girls think I’m a slut, and I’ve been in the same relationship since I was 18. The problem is, if they think you’re attractive, you’re either stupid or a whore or a dumb whore. The instinct among girls is to attack the jugular.”

Stop right there. Could it be that maybe, just maybe, really this is just a hunch, that we don’t think Megan Fox is stupid, or a whore, or a stupid whore? Is it in fact possible that women just don’t enjoy having grand, sweeping generalizations made about them that are entirely negative, coupled with the fact that she just called all of our friends ugly?

Granted, our homegirls may not have 22-inch waists and date a guy from “Beverly Hills 90210,” but that doesn’t make them totally busted. In fact, I wouldn’t rank any of my friends below a 7, and that’s a sober rating, folks.

The point is that she’s not so wonderful that she can insult us and the people we care about and expect to earn our trust. Unlike dudes, we aren’t blinded by her rather magnificent bosom. We have awesome boobs, too.

If Megan Fox really wants to gain the trust of women everywhere, maybe she should stop calling us jealous, scheming lunatics who are vastly inferior to her in terms of looks and personality. That seems like a pretty good start. Also, Megan, nobody wants to know what your farts smell like. OK, someone probably does, but we’re not that person. And it’s not because we’re jealous of your sphincter or something.”

See the original article here.

Yes, I am a guy.  Yes, I would bang Meagan Fox in two goddamn seconds if given the chance (hell, I’d endure 6 hours of water-boarding if it got me 6 minutes of sex with her).  However, she sucks.  I really just don’t like her and I have no respect for her.  This is more vindication that my opinion is valid…good female perspective as well.

rockandrollhistory:

An interesting night tonight. In chronological order: 1) a girl told me she would, “Facebook the shit out of me,” when she got home tonight, 2) then another girl who I’ve had an on and off again relationship with recently told me that whenever she thought of me it made her happier than she had been in a long time and that I was perfect in every way but that she wasn’t in a place mentally where she wanted a long term thing, 3) then a gay friend of a friend said, very vocally to everyone I was with at that moment, that I was the cutest guy he’d seen in months and months, and, finally, 4) I got free ice cream because it was my friend Amber’s birthday and she didn’t want most of it. So, really, a night of ups and downs, but mostly ups.

NOTE: I also received a free gin and tonic and only spent $6 tonight while getting pretty drunk. So, bonus.

I truly dig it when my friends share stories like this.  As we read, it becomes apparent that on this particular evening, Adrian was king.   You could look at his tumblr post and scoff, with the thought that he is arrogant.  I say nay! You are either jealous or…well, a doucher quite frankly.

I have an audible Homer Simpson magnet on my refrigerator.  When it is smacked by an open palm it announces: “This is the greatest day of my life!”  I hit it once everyday.  I have done this for 3 years.  I would say Homer is inaccurate in his assessment of my day 90% of the time.  But, when he is right…that 10%…it’s gold.

rockandrollhistory got his 10%.  Let’s celebrate it.

AK alllllllll dayyyyy!!!

I mean honestly…banana is the worst artificial flavor.  I’ve never bitten into a banana Laffy Taffy and thought to myself, “wowzers! that tastes just like a Chiquita!”  Seriously, what’s the deal?  Listen, I know a lot of scientific resources are used to try and find cures for cancer,aids, and other chronic illnesses, but can we put a stop to this madness?